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Not Your Pinterest Wedding


It’s autumn of 2016. I conducted massive amounts of research and called maxillofacial surgeon after maxillofacial surgeon, which isn’t as easy as it sounds. A maxillofacial surgeon is an oral surgeon who has undergone additional training to be able to address more complex medical and dental issues. Sometimes, if you Google maxillofacial surgeon, you won’t find many because they list themselves as an oral surgeon. Some insurance companies won’t even list them separately on their website either and just provides options for oral surgeons. No, I don’t need my wisdom teeth removed, that happened in 2001. I need my face moved.

I made a list of all oral surgeons I could find and called them. One by one. I asked if they performed jaw realignment surgery and if they accepted my insurance. At some point in this part of the story, I was hanging out with my friend, Sarah, and her mom, Carlyn, helping to plan Sarah’s wedding as her Maid of Honor. Carlyn is in the dental field in New Jersey and recommended a maxillofacial surgeon to me, Dr. L. Top notch surgeon in Jersey, just outside Philly. He’s even the doctor for the Philadelphia Flyers! But New Jersey? So far.

But with what felt like limited options here in Baltimore, I ended up seeing Dr. L sometime around October of 2017. He confirmed everything I had been told. Surgery would happen once I had better insurance.

Now, hold on to your seats kids, this ride gets crazy.  

Gary and I had been dating for a few years and were now living together. We had also discussed by this point that we'd get married one day too. After I met with Dr. L, I approached Gary for a difficult (for me) conversation. I basically told him I needed his insurance to have the surgery since a domestic partnership, which we had recently investigated, was no longer a qualifying event for someone to be added to health insurance. Being the ever-incredible man who continues to blow my mind with his love and support, he said sure, when the time was right.

November of 2017 was the worst month of my life for reasons I will not get into. Little did I know, that while this challenging month was barreling over me, Gary was ring shopping, sending my sister, Angela, options and went to see my parents to ask for their permission. The initial plans for the proposal got a little derailed, but it turned out perfectly for me. We were engaged!

That was Saturday, November 18th. A mere 6 weeks later, to the day, we were married. I had never given my “dream wedding” much thought before this, so having a short or long engagement wasn’t something we had thought about. But life sometimes dictates plans for you and I needed Gary’s insurance. And if we were going to get married soon, why not do it in 2017 for the tax benefits? Plus, Gary's brother, sister-in-law and their 3 boys would also be in Brooklyn, NY for Christmas & New Year’s visiting family, so why not have them drive down 3 hours versus coming up from Alabama, where they lived at the time.

A few days after the proposal, we flew to Orlando for Thanksgiving with Gary’s mom, brother, wife and kids. One afternoon while there, Gary and I took some alone time and grabbed lunch and drinks...mmmmm queso! While we enjoyed a drink or two, we just about planned our entire wedding: texted family and confirmed a date, confirmed our friend, Milton, would marry us and emailed a few venues to see if they had space. And by venues, I mean local bars. I wore the one and only dress I tried on, which was ordered online from Macy’s. Gary wore a suit he already owned.

*Side note: I really wanted a cello player to play at the wedding. Gary researched one afternoon and found Wade from the Peabody. When I hear him play, I feel as if I’m floating on a fluffy cloud. We booked him immediately. I called the venue to confirm the menu, we’re now 2ish weeks out and told them I’d need a chair for the cello player. Here is our end of the conversation with the venue: “What? What do you mean there isn’t room for one extra chair? Huh?! Why would you book us the conference room with a massive, can’t budge conference table? I’m literally getting married in this room, no I don’t want a conference table that no one can move around. The larger room is available? Yes, of course I want that one!” Sighhhh. Always visit your wedding venue before you book it! I’m so glad it worked out.

Being that the planning period was 44 days and the venue held just 24 people, we were unable to invite many of those nearest and dearest to us. We hope to one day have a vow renewal  ceremony and invite everyone, not until this journey is over though. I highly recommend a short engagement, keeps costs and stress low. I highly also recommend a "go with it" attitude. There was an ice storm the day we got married, it was below freezing and I had a sore throat. The morning of our wedding, I actually was on the couch watching Netflix and walked to Rite-Aid a few blocks away to get extra cough drops. It still turned out to be the best day.

We went on our honeymoon a month later, which we planned & booked in less than a week. Two weeks in Argentina starting off with a week in Mendoza visiting friends and family from Gary’s mom’s side, where she grew up. Then following week was spent in Buenos Aires. It was the trip of a lifetime. Gary is fluent in Spanish, it was his first language, so I had been learning the language for the previous 18 months. But it got worse while there as everyone wanted to practice their English with me. 




Funny bonus story, LatAm airlines lost my luggage at our layover in Lima, Peru for 4 days. So I walk out of the airport into 80+ degree of an Argentine summer with pants and a sweater on as it was 30 degrees when I left Baltimore the previous day. We checked into out vineyard villa and then went shopping. 

By day 3, we went back out for more clothes and I learned that Gary did not know how to say bra in Spanish. His excuse was "why would I ever need to know that". We're at this cute little shop and he's gesturing to the ladies who were helping us, that I need "clothing for the tits" as he cups imaginary breasts on himself. It was an interesting way to start our honeymoon:) 

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